2022 Newsletter draft that I never sent out

Hello everyone, I realise it's been a while since I've been in contact I feel the plague has now lessened to a degree but I can cope with potentially starting a newsletter again.

It has been a couple of years since I sent one out and I apologise for my lack of contact but I haven't really had anything to update you on because I've just been trying to claw myself back out of the covid pit.

So what's been going on during covid? Not a whole hell of a lot regarding station glass I have to admit. During the first lockdown I made rainbow hearts which allowed me to pay the bills but now I'm rather sick of the sight of them and I don't want to make any more for a long time.

When things started getting a little bit back to normal I took a hit in the form of my assistant Georgina White taking on a new role at a different glass makers. She left with my blessing although a little earlier than either of us expected. 

You would like to Follow her career she has moved to Bristol Blue Glass blowing as a full-time assistant amongst other roles.

So in 2022 I was focusing on trying to make enough stock to keep the shop full whilst also looking for a new assistant. I borrowed two students from De Montfort University during their third year on the glass making course. Although I only had them for a couple of months as they both moved back home after they graduated. 

I enjoyed working with them and their enthusiasm and willingness to learn was quite infectious. Georgia Hazel and Jasmine Cayen. 

Earlier this year in February I visited Teign Valley Glass based in the House of Marbles in Devon. They run an event called the Melting Pot where several glass blowers get together to demonstrate their work or collaborate or generally just have a fun time playing with glass and experimenting. 

Richard Glass runs Teign Valley Glass assisted by the wonderful Imogen McCullen.

I had such a wonderful time that I have been desperate to get back down there but circumstances here have prevented my journey back down as yet. 

I will try to add a few pictures from my visit including my failed attempt at one of the lampposts which sits outside of station glass. 

Recent developments include a new stockist in Stourbridge and me completing my personal Track Safety Training so I can now legally and safely retrieve things that small children accidentally drop on the train tracks. 

In August we had the first International Festival of Glass since Covid hit and some of it was lovely. Seeing all the glassy people you haven't seen for ages, watching demonstrations, buying a few bits at the auction, seeing my friends open up their new gallery/studio, showing some people around who hadn't visited before, watching some new glassmakers networking and thriving, seeing the museum open properly with some great exhibits. 

There was also an air of things changing, the price of gas was a frequently discussed topic, there was an electric glory hole being demonstrated which all the glassmakers were eager to try. 

There was an overwhelming air of "What the hell are we going to do?" among the artists and the positive people all seemed to have fixed price gas accounts for several years in advance. Some of them are shutting off their furnaces for prolonged periods whilst they figure out what to do. Some are streamling their practices (myself included) and trying to figure out ways of making glass with less gas and electricity. 

Just before August I interviewed two lovely ladies who have both since started working at Station Glass. 

Rosie Perret and Melissa Keshkinkalich. 

Rosie is a DMU graduate who is also currently working at Lumsdale Glass. 

Melissa (of Melissa's Melting Pot) is currently taking the evening glassblowing course at Dudley College, alongside teaching lampworking and fusing classes. She began her glass journey at an evening class at Plymouth University alongside training to be a teacher.

They are both enthusiastic and enjoying their training! I am having lots of fun teaching them new techniques as we go along. 

The last few months have been a bit of a blur ending with me getting the flu and having to have the end of the year off and missing Christmas all together. It hit me quite badly because of my asthma. (Yes I am an asthmatic glassblower!) I'm slowly recovering in to the new year and we will get back on track again soon! 

Professional practices

I've just listened to a podcast called "I like your work" they bring up the issue of having little to no professional practise induction into the real world, or examples of what to do once you leave university and how to pursue your artistic career.

We had professional practice courses at university where we were encouraged to make samples of our work to send to galleries, we were encouraged to brand ourselves or make ourselves in to a brand and basically apply for everything that we could.

The first time I graduated was in the 2008 recession so when I left University there were no jobs There were no opportunities and no one knew what they were doing, whether their gallery would survive, if their practice would survive and sadly many did not survive.

The second time I graduated was in 2011. I took a master's course because my boring normal job was killing me.

As a masters student I really would have benefited from some sort of guidance on what to do in the artistic world. I already have some work in a gallery but it was not a lot of work and it was only one small gallery.

It was also work that I could not make at home.

So I bought a kiln and started making smaller versions of that work which led me to realise that the pricing system that I put in place at university did not apply any longer.

I had to rethink my process, my prices and my ability to actually create the work whilst working another temporary job.

At the time I had a weekend job working in a clothes shop, who would change my hours weekly and expect me to show up regardless and have no other commitments.

When I needed to take a large piece of glass to be acid dipped and I got stuck there for several hours I couldn't make it to my shift, I got a disciplinary and essentially after the temporary term was up they did not keep me on because I had absences. Totally worth it.

In the long run it was better for my career but at the time I liked having some form of stable income... and discount on clothing.

Something I learnt whilst I was making pieces for this small gallery (which were large cast glass sculptures) was that the gallery owner had completely unrealistic expectations about how long it took me to make a large glass piece.

Basically she had a customer who wanted a specific colour of the sculpture before Christmas. She had given me 3 months, so I reluctantly agreed but because I had to rush things through and have a piece made before Christmas it ended up costing me more than usually would, not to mention petrol, running around, stress, etc and I managed to get it to her three days before Christmas. I later found out that she did not give it to the customer until 2 weeks later so I had rushed for nothing. I ended up just covering my costs making that sculpture. 

Things like this made me realise that I needed to set clear boundaries on how long something would take to make and adjust pricing accordingly for creating work outside of a University environment. I had not taken in to account that I had to order a lot of casting crystal from another country before I could start, or factored in hiring a large kiln because I didn't have access to the university kiln. 

I was hindered slightly in that someone at the university told me I could hire the kilns once I'd graduated as an alumni but when I tried to actually initiate this I was told that there was no such protocol for ex-students hiring kilns or equipment. So I had to go and find a kiln large enough that I could hire elsewhere. The hire of the kiln cost me over half the price of the sculpture so that's basically where I lost all of my profit.

I hope that I can benefit someone by making these mistakes first, or maybe, I don't know, creating a lecture or something to help people when they are first starting out in the art world.

Because not every opportunity is quite as great as it might seem at first glance. 

    

    

(From three years ago) "What you want to do is..." but do I?

My life seems to be plagued with "What you want to do is..." insert someone else's idea of success here. I have to confess when I hear those 6 words my eyes glaze over, I begin to examine my own thoughts and stop listening to the speaker. The speaker who is telling me what I "want" to do. Often the speaker knows little about me, often they are giving me their opinion on what they think I should do regarding my business. A business they are not a part of, in an industry they are not a part of.
A woman has never said that sentence to me (unless they were explaining how to use a computer program to me in which case I consider it perfectly acceptable) and a woman has rarely said to me "You don't want to do that" whilst I often hear this from men.
Even men I am close to use these words. An example that springs to mind is when I shaved part of my head (which happens regularly) my grandfather told me that I didn't want to do that again and that I had "spoilt myself" because I looked so nice before... With my normal shoulder-length hair. I was upset that my grandfather considered me to be less acceptable in some way with a hairstyle I preferred.

I have been told recently several times that "what I want to do" is to get on Amazon because that's where the real money is. No one has considered the fact that I can't make enough stock fast enough to compete in that market. Maybe in ten years time but certainly not in the near future.

The main reason I am offended by this choice of words is that people presume to know what it is that I want. When in fact they just want to tell me what they think I should do. They give me their opinion in the guise of helpful advice. It has never been requested and it probably never will be. The people I have actually asked for advice never used those words. Plus the people I have asked for advice are experts in their field and I usually a part of the same industry that I am.

So this was just a small rant about people giving me advice weather I want it or not.

Brain Dump. November 2021

I feel like I am struggling to find myself artistically 

I think I have imposter syndrome. 

I don't feel like I have a voice worthy of saying anything in the art world because I come from a privileged background and I've never had to suffer through any severe hardship. 

I've had trauma and depression which is hard but I didn't grow up in poverty, I wasn't physically abused, I don't have anything traumatic my life in that way and somehow I feel that that makes me less valid than other people. I have fewer things to say, I almost feel like my opinion is not worthy of being heard.

I don't know if this is a response to me not being happy where I am artistically, I don't know if this is overthinking things and making reasons to just not "put my work out there" or make my own conceptual pieces. It's almost like I'm frightened. Whenever I think about making pieces I think about the reactions people would have to them, often that is enough to just put me off making it completely. As you can imagine this is maybe a little bit of a setback for an artist. It doesn't help that the last two years have been entirely focused on trying to stay afloat, trying to make enough glass to fulfil orders (I am grateful to have those orders) I'm trying to sell work to pay the bills throughout the pandemic. We are doing well financially now but we weren't for some time, especially in the first lockdown.

I was rejected for funding but was able to get a small discretionary grant which enabled me to basically pay my rent and not much else. I'm just lucky that I had some savings that I could bail myself out with.

This last year I've also questioned a lot if this is what I want to do or not. My life would have been easier if I just went to work for someone else, came home and then did creative things as a hobby instead of my career. My inspiration for making has just bombed. I've just sat and looked at blank pages in my sketchbook. All of my paints have dried up which I only discovered recently because it has been so long since I painted anything.

I have bought myself some new paints now because that made me incredibly sad. I used to want to create all the time and all I want to do right now is survive... I am seeing the light at the end of a tunnel, it just seems like it's a very long way away.

It doesn't help that we are rapidly approaching Christmas and I I'm not particularly happy around this time of year.

I know I'm gonna get called Scrooge or Humbug but I don't enjoy Christmas. I don't enjoy the run-up to Christmas, I don't enjoy the vast amounts of consumerism and I'm at the juxtaposition of relying on some of that for a portion of my income every year so I feel like a hypocrite. I also reluctantly partake in the mass consumerism every year although I try to source thoughtful gifts rather than just purchasing cheap things which were made in China and shipped to the UK.

Brexit has also made it difficult to post things or import things currently. Our docks are so busy and clogged up because of Covid restrictions and god knows however many rules there are now for importing things and shipping things. 

So yeah, it's a weird time. I'm wondering when the weirdness will settle down a bit and the UK might have a chance to heal again. 

When I might have a chance to breathe again... 

I'm near the end of orders now. So close! Just a few things left to coldwork and ship.

Then I can start on people's custom orders, as opposed to shops orders. 

Just keep swimming...

    

September 2021. Furnace issues.

I am struggling creatively right now. This is the second time that my furnace has gone down this year, this time an element has gone. Last time the whole pot cracked, at least this time it's a little bit easier to fix. 

My motivation is low and I need to fix my furnace as quickly as possible. So naturally I'm just standing here looking at it.

It came at a time when I was stressing myself out with orders, putting too much pressure on myself to finish things faster than I could. There were several factors like incredibly hot weather and illness on my part which slowed me down. It also happened immediately after I got out of isolation, when my dad contracted covid-19 so I was stuck in the house with him for 10 days. Luckily I did not contract the virus and my dad did not have severe symptoms.

There were other issues with the furnace which needed addressing so I took the time to fix those too. Hopefully this will lead to less stress in the future. 

The furnace is now fixed and we have been up and running again for a couple of weeks. As soon as it was fixed I got more orders, naturally. We are soldiering on with the ever-expanding list.

My assistant Georgina is (as ever) a godsend. She is currently taking up some of the slack because my back is bad from making a heavy piece the other day. 

I feel like there aren't enough hours in the day to make all of my orders within the time frame that my suppliers would like them. 

    

We are working an extra day a week to make work for Georgina, who has a show coming up in the next couple of months. She's making some great work and I'm sure she'll be very well known in glass collectors circles soon. 

I'm trying my best to support Georgina in her early career as a glass maker. She has the determination and drive I wish I'd had at her age. 

I feel like we will be consistently busy up until Christmas. 

We're going to try and push Halloween a bit more this year, we will be doing demonstrations in the dark, toasting marshmallows, making popcorn and we are having a glass pumpkin patch. 

I have also been invited make the Northern Paperweight Society's anniversary paperweight. So obviously I am panicking about that. That is quite a lot of pressure from collectors who expect a very high standard of work. 

They also want letter murrini, which I have never made before. As yet I have not had the time to practice it. 

So basically I'm stressed and panicking about multiple things and a general lack of time to do them in. 

Does the stress and the panicking help? 

Highly unlikely. 

Can I stop it? 

Unfortunately not.

Let's hope I can manage it, at least until Christmas. 

2020 a global pandemic

Well damn. This year was hard. Covid19 hit the world. 

People died. Businesses stopped. The economy crumbled. We had to stay home for long periods of time. Masks were scarce, then they weren't. We isolated. There was panic buying. The NHS showed up for us. Many people did not see their friends and family for a very long time. Some were trapped abroad. Most were trapped at home. 

What happened during my second year of owning Station Glass? 

A global pandemic. 

It's January 2021 now and we are in lockdown again. Only essential shops are open and cases of covid19 are at an all time high because people all came together for Christmas. The vaccine is being rolled out to NHS workers, the elderly and the most vulnerable. We are moving in the right direction but it's slow going. 

Last year was a rollercoaster of open the studio, shut the studio and our sales were up and down with footfall. I ordered cullet and glass colour before Brexit happened so it was a big spend year for me. I managed to get a small grant which helped immensely with paying my rent. Sometimes I could have Georgina there to work with me and sometimes one or both of us were isolating. 

It's been a truly random year but the business is still alive and I hope we are coming back with more organisation and more enthusiasm for making some interesting glass. 

We will have to see how the rest of the year goes. 

Four Women Glass Artists

I attended the 2018 Glass Art Society conference held on the island of Murano. At Abate Zanetti I attended a panel moderated by Amy Schwartz entitled Four Women Glass Artists, these consisted of Amber Cowen, Claire Kelly, Jen Blazina and Suzanne Taylor-Glasgow. They were to discuss their unique approaches to the history and media of glass. These women are all excellent glass makers and I have followed some of their careers for some time.
I was a little disappointed by the lack of diversity in that their backgrounds however. They all spoke of extremely supportive partners (which is great and I would never wish for anything different), some spoke of how supportive their parents had been, but when the question was posed "Do you think you have been treated differently because of your gender?" each one answered "No". How have these women managed to receive no negative input because of their gender? The fact that they have progressed through their artistic career with helpful and supportive men really truly warms my heart because it means we are headed in the right direction.
Neither I nor the people I was with during the panel can imagine being in a place where we are not constantly questioned about whether we are in fact "real" glassmakers, the assumption made by the general public always seems to be that we are the secretary, the till worker, the cleaner, the apprentice, anything in fact other than the owner of the studio.
Myself and Dominique Cassie (Owner of Terrapin Glass Studio, NH) have encountered a whole heap of mysogonism and casual sexism. I'm at a point where I'm sick of constant belittlement, put downs, when the men assume we have no skill because of our gender, etc. It is quite frankly heartbreaking.
So many assumptions are made, based purely on our gender. Statistically women are less likely to have their work selected for an exhibition, we are less likely to be be published, work is less likely to be purchased if it is next to a piece made by a man. Unfortunately this is factually accurate. Now I'm not saying that life isn't being fair, that old men in suits aim to keep us down etc, etc... Some men actively help empower us, unfortunately it takes all men to see us as equals, this includes peers, colleagues, collectors and teachers. Personally I have been lucky enough to have an excellent mentor and friend in the form of Richard Golding. Who has always treated me one hundred percent  respectfully and been wonderfully supportive.
The initial point is that myself and my peers did not think these for women represented the vest majority of female glass makers. I appreciate them putting themselves out there to receive questions and open themselves up to debate everything about their personal paths. That is a hard thing to do for most people.
This is in no way a criticism of the four woman of the panel, I enjoyed learning about their respective journeys into glass. I think I might like to see a broader age range on similar panels in the future though. People in different stages of their careers maybe. Completely different backgrounds and cultural influences would make for a more interesting discussion and understanding of cultural norms with regard to our industry.